i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
