Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I wish there were birth control emojis
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
