I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
