On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
