operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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