I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Randomize
