drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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