no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I'm really busy with my period
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