I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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