im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
okay pat passed out under dana's car
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
