How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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