She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
