Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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