The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
