he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
