Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm at about main and main street
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize