You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
