Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
