38 yer olds are good kisserssss
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
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