We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
