im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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