just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
