I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
