once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
