Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize