just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
