she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
