ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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