You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
