My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
