Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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