Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
