"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
