just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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