You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
