that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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