this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
