so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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