i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Even my vagina gasped.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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