haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize