Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
