Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(239): View more from Florida

I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...

Fav 12 981 3054
share tweet
(714): View more from California

Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.

Fav 10 829 2201
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(352): View more from Florida

He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.

Fav 8 897 3340
share tweet
(425): View more from Washington

There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.

Fav 48 923 3684
share tweet
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Read it at the TFLN blog
(330): View more from Ohio

She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.

Fav 61 2450 4701
share tweet
(818): View more from California

Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.

Fav 5 1425 3420
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.

Fav 5 1614 1004
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.

Fav 2 733 530
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(252): View more from North Carolina

Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.

Fav 5 35 27
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT