Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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