And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
