I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
