i woke up with socks on this morning
i didnt wear socks last night
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
21 Disappointing Confessions From Teenage Fathers
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.