It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
He kissed a someone with a penis
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I pour the whiskey from now on
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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