3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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