i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
