Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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