I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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