Can i not drive my cunt home
I can text with my tongue
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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